Sunday, January 30, 2011

Guía detallada para crear un blog exitoso

Opinión sobre post: 

Por muchos años personas se han acercado a mi a preguntarme: Oye cabrón, ¿cómo puedo hacer un blog?  Yo no sabía como responderles porque explicar algo que la gente común y corriente pueda entender es difícil. Por ejemplo, cómo tú le explicas a un bebe de 3 añitos que él es producto de una noche de placer donde el bicho del papá clavó la vagina de la mamá (no quiero decir chocha porque hay una nena que le estoy tirando maíz por Twitter y no le gusta esa palabra) y luego de un sexo salvaje (cada vez que diga esta palabra a Christian Ortega le llega un chequecito de $3 por regalías de derechos de autor, ¡estás cabrón!). Esto es difícil, pero como tengo muchos fans que me lo han preguntado porque quieren comenzar a bloguear pa hablar mierda, pues me he motivado a escribir esta guía detallada y fácil de entender para motivarte a abrir un blog.

Para crear los blogs y comenzar a escribir debes hacer exactamente lo siguiente.

1. Comprar una duchita de bebe en Kmart y llenarlo de alcoholado hasta la mitad.

2. Poner la duchita frente al televisor y prenderlo en CV24.

3. Buscar una computadora, preferiblemente marca Apple porque son mas cabronas.

4. Prender la computadora.

5. Hacerte una piña colada.

6. Esperar a que la computadora prenda.

7. Abrir un browser, ya sea Safari, Firefox o Chrome.

8. Escribir arriba en el browser youporn.com.

9. Esperar a que abra la página, luego ve a Recommendations. Si no sale nada, busca en el search arriba por “hairy pussy”.

10. Escoger la primera película que salga de la lista y verla mientras te bebes la piña colada. No es necesario masturbarse.

11. Al finalizar la película, lleva el vaso al fregadero y lo limpias. No lo dejes sucio porque se puede llenar de hormigas.

12. Cerrar todas las puertas de tu casa para evitar distracciones. Apagar también los teléfonos y carritos control remoto.

13. Abrir otro browser y escribir cualquiera de los siguientes servicios de blog: blogger.com, wordpress.com, posterous.com o tumblr.com.

14. Luego de escoger el más que te gusta, abres el blog y listo. Te pones a escribir y ya esta. Es bien fácil y si tienes duda pregúntale a los miles de blogueros puertorriqueños que día tras día escriben cosas a cambio de hacerte reír, llorar, pensar y encabronarte.  Hay otros que lo hacen para hacer dinero, pero son la minoría.

Espero que esta guía te sea útil. Esto fue lo que yo hice en el 2006 cuando comence con mi blog. Para que tengas un blog exitoso, vas a tener que escribir mucho y todos los días. Es el unico truco que funciona. Me harás bien orgulloso si comentas al respecto y si esta guía te sirvió mucho a la hora de motivarte a crear un blog.

34 comments:

Lylyhec said...

Nunca me decepcionas Manny. Y gracias por no usar la palabra fea esa que no me gusta. Estoy orgullosa de ti!

Manny Colón said...

gracias Lylyhec! viste.. estoy mejorando... transformandome en un caballero nocturno con modales.

Mierdoso said...

Jajajajaja Mannyyyyyyyyy! Como q t desviastes ahi en eso d youporn jajaja! Estamos redi!

@leojacket said...

loco gracias por el post. En estos dias me paso buscando como atraer mas flujo de personas al blog!

Hice todo menos el punto 8. En vez de meterme a youporn me meti en longporntube.com, fap fap y despues abri mi blog:http://vacilounge.blogspot.com/

Que le recomiendas aquellos que no pueden escribir todos los dias?

Manny Colón said...

Mierdoso, espero que tu mierda nos llegue todos los dias con tus comentarios mierdosos..

@leojacket, pues mano... trata de tener al menos 3 posts decentes por semana y entonces haces un schedule con posts menores el resto de los dias. Por jemplo, posts menores pueden ser videos, fotos, cosas cortas... que puedes dejar programadas para que se autopubliquen cuando quieras... entonces te dedicas a tener 3 posts largos o decentes que escribas y publicas cuando puedas.

Deb @ThirtyCreative said...

Yo me quedo con los puntos 13 y 14 ademas del consejo que le distes a @leojacket. Tambien la seleccion de los titulos de las entradas es bien importante y tu los haz sabido utilizar!

Maximiliano Pérez said...

Tremendo! Gracias!

Andrea Lea said...

Por este blog es que me he motivado abrir uno, para contar las cosas que unas "nena buena" no se atreve a decir en publico. Historias de amor y lujuria, experiencias de bellaqueo. En fin lo que no me atrevo a contarle a alguien. Ya lo abri, me falta empezar a escribrir. Cuando ya tengan algunos posts lo tiro al medio por aqui.

Manny Colón said...

Andrea, tiralo al medio.... podemos hacerte un Boricua Power y a la vez promo al blog...

Anonymous said...

diablo loco me he reido con cojones!!! XD

Manny Colón said...

Anonimo, quien carajo tu eres? jaja

Anonymous said...

hat bereits Schonbein hervorgehoben.

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